| Tally | Sayings |
|---|
| 821 | May your ears turn into arseholes and shit on your shoulders.
insult |
| 476 | You must be the world's only living brain donor.
dumb or stupid to the extreme |
| 450 | He's floggin the log/dog again!
Havin' a wank. (Masturbating) |
| 336 | He had a head on him like a sucked mango.
~ |
| 299 | May the fleas of a thousand camels infest your armpits.
You're basically scum |
| 297 | Too slow to keep worms in a tin.
~ |
| 288 | May your chooks turn into emus and kick your dunny down.
~ |
| 251 | So stupid that he wouldn't know a tram was up him 'til the bell rang!
~ |
| 250 | Couldn't organise a piss-up in a brewery.
can't organise anything |
| 233 | I'm going to give birth to your twin!
Have a shit |
| 232 | I hope the hairs up your arse turn into drumsticks and beat the shit out of you
~ |
| 227 | If I wanted to talk to an asshole like you, I would 've farted!
Go away and leave me alone |
| 221 | Oh, pull your lip over your head and swallow!
Go away or shut up. |
| 208 | If I had a dog that looked like him, I'd shave it's arse and make it walk backwards.
~ |
| 202 | Ugly as a hatful/bucket of arseholes.
~ |
| 198 | Ya bloody wombat.
Insult |
| 185 | He couldn't find his arse with both hands, even if his fingers were flashlights!
Real busy, or real stupid |
| 179 | About as useful as a one-legged man in an arse kicking contest.
Of absolutely no use... |
| 178 | He must have 2 penises...he couldn't be that stupid from pulling one.
Stupid |
| 164 | You have an IQ of 2 , and it takes 3 to grunt!
~ |
| 160 | More arse than class.
~ |
| 159 | May the all pores of your skin turn into little assholes and cover you in shit!
Insult |
| 156 | Couldn't drive a greasy stick up a dog's arse
Is a lousy driver |
| | Couldn't tell his ass from a hole in the ground.
Stupid or confused |
| 153 | Got a face like a bashed in shit can.
Insult |
| 151 | Couldn't organise a fuck in a brothel with a fist full of fifties.
unlucky,stupid, ignorant just plain dumb usually refers to bad management |
| 145 | He couldn't fight his way out of a wet paper bag.
weak |
| 144 | Seen better legs on a table.
Cellulite city. Fat legs. |
| 141 | Wouldn't say shit if he had a mouthful.
The quiet type |
| 140 | You're a waste of sperm/space/air.
~ |
| 135 | Get a woolly dog up ya.
get lost |
| 130 | He wouldn't work in an iron lung
Lazy. |
| 122 | I'll kick your bum till your nose bleeds!
~ |
| 121 | You're as handy as shit on a stick.
your not much help |
| | Couldn't fix a root in a brothel!
Can't organise anything. |
| 119 | Her! She's got a face like a smacked arse.
Boy! You are ugly |
| 118 | May your arse cheeks turn into bicycle wheels and backpedal up your arse!
~ |
| 116 | Seen better heads in a piss trough.
Ugly. |
| 113 | Couldn't organise a fart in a chillie eating contest.
not good at organisation |
| 112 | (insultingly) Ankles.
three feet lower than a cunt or the only thing seen out of the boss's arse - a suckup |
| 110 | So unlucky that if it were raining virgins he would be struck in the head by a poof.
Really unlucky. |
| 107 | Ya bloody galah!
You slow witted one. |
| | Lower than a snake's armpit / arsehole.
Pretty underhanded |
| 106 | No more sense than a native bear, an' not half as good-lookin'.
Dumb |
| 102 | You're as good as two blondes put together.
Not very smart |
| 100 | He's off like a bucket of prawns in the hot sun.
I am out of here! |
| 95 | He has F.I.T.H. Syndrome.
He's fucked in the head (stupid) |
| 93 | You usless kiwi import.
~ |
| 91 | If your I. Q. were 2 points higher it would be the same as a bloody stone.
Pretty dumb. |
| 89 | He couldn't drive a nail into a bucket of water.
to a hopeless driver |
| 88 | Wouldn't know if his arse was on fire.
Stupid Person |
| | Dumber than a box / wagon load of rocks.
Not troubled by intelligence |
| 84 | Go and stick your head up a dead bear's bum.
Koala bear that is! |
| 81 | Face like a smashed crab.
ugly |
| | You've got tickets on yourself mate!
Someone who thinks a lot of themselves |
| 80 | As ugly as a bulldog chewing a wasp.
Ugly |
| 79 | Got a face like a mile of unpaved road.
Pretty ugly |
| 78 | You little bugger.
Brat, pain in the arse. |
| 72 | He couldn't pull the skin off a custard.
weak |
| 70 | Tis a pity thy mouth be ringed with teeth, 'cos doth spoil a perfect arsehole.
Ugly as all S... |
| | Shut your cake hole.
~ |
| 68 | I wish his dad had settled for a blow job.
Obvious insult. |
| | He wouldn't know if a brass band was up him unless he got the drum!
~ |
| 66 | Face like a mallee root.
ugly |
| | You've got a head like a half-eaten pastie.
~ |
| 64 | He's a lousy bastard.
A mean miserable man. |
| 60 | Couldn't run a bath!
hopeless at organizing, running a business |
| 58 | She could scare buzzards off of a meat wagon!
She's ugly |
| 57 | She was so ugly that when she walked on the beach even the sewerage got up and left!
Fairly obvious insult. |
| 56 | You're as ugly as a box of blowflies.
Insult |
| 55 | You half-pie poofter.
~ |
| 53 | Couldn't drive ducks to water.
A hopeless car driver |
| 52 | The lift doesn't go to the top floor/all the way to the top.
not very bright |
| 51 | Your face is like a twisted ugg boot.
Insult |
| 49 | She's as ugly as a mud fence in a rainstorm.
~ |
| | Don't invite that mangy old bastard.
Don't invite him as he is mean with his money and/or gifts. |
| 48 | Geez your brothers ugly! / Jesus Christ your sister is ugly!
Said to a twin as an insult. |
| 47 | Popular as a mangy dog.
Not popular. |
| | He couldn't get a kick in a cow yard.
to a useless football player |
| 46 | Your face looks like a cats arse!
you are ugly |
| 43 | What will you do for a face when the monkey wants it's arse back?
You're ugly |
| 42 | Why don't you pull a brown-eye and show us your stretch marks?
a way of putting down a heckler |
| 39 | Too useless to grow chokos on a backyard dunny.
Hopeless. |
| 37 | Ugly as a deep sea racing mullet!
Ugly chick |
| 36 | Couldn't produce a fart in a licorice factory.
See: Useless as tits on a bull |
| 32 | If I want any shit from you, I'll squeeze your head.
I don't wish for your opinion at this time, thank you! |
| 30 | If I had a head like yours I'd circumcise it.
Your an ugly and stupid person. |
| 29 | He's got death adders in 'is kick.
Mean with his money-kick=pocket. |
| 27 | A face like a marron and hands like a couple of yabbies.
ugly |
| 24 | Wank stain!
loser |
| 23 | If brains were dynamite, he could blow the dust from his ears.
thick as a brick |
| 19 | You're fucked in the head and got shit for brains.
Idiot |
| 18 | You are so fat you need a road map to find your arse!
~ |
| 17 | Hope your crabs turn into lobsters and eat your crutch out!!!
I really don't like you much. |
| 16 | Stick a ferret up yer clacker.
~ |
| | Rip your bloody arms off and belt you with the sloppy end.
~ |
| | He's so far up himself he's coming out the other end.
~ |
| | Pull your flaps over your head and turn yourself into a red back spider.
shut up woman |
| 15 | Sharp as a beachball.
Not very bright/quick. |
| 14 | You're \ it's about as useful as a bag full of farts.
useless |
| | If brains where dynamite, you wouldn't have enough to blow your hat off!!!
~ |
| 13 | You've got a head like a dropped pie.
Very Ugly |
| 12 | He's got more corrugations than a water tank.
Lots of spare tyres- Rolls of fat. |
| | If brains were shit, you wouldnt have enough to fart.
you're stupid |
| | If brains were dynamite, he wouldn't have enough to blow his nose.
stupid |
| 10 | He/She was beaten by the ugly stick while swinging from the ugly tree.
is very, very ugly |
| 9 | He would root the hair on a barber shop floor.
Not fussy |
| 8 | He's just a two-bob drongo!
He's an idiot worth about two bob (twenty cents) |
| 7 | She's got the face of a bush pig.
boy she's ugly |
| | She/He'd scare a dog out of a butcher's shop.
Pretty bloody obvious - Cheers ! |
| 6 | He's about as much use as a fart in a thunderstorm!!
he is totally useless/ a waste of space |
| | You couldn't drive a fart out of your own arse!
a bad driver |
| | Doesn't know shit from clay.
stupid |
| | Fat as a boarding house pudding.
chubby |
| | She has a head like someone tried to put out a campfire with a screwdriver.
very, very ugly!!!! |
| 5 | Couldn't organise a dog fuck in a paper bag.
Hopeless at doing anything administrative |
| | (You'd want to know) the in's and out's of a magpies arsehole.
Response to a busy body |
| | He/She has all the brains of a stunted swamp chigger.
~ |
| 1 | Couldn't drive a wet soapy finger up his own ass.
can't drive |
| | So up herself she needs a refidex to find her way out.
loves herself |
| | You're enough to give diarrhoea the shits!
a person really annoys the hell out of you! |
| | Wanks on planks.
Skateboarder |
| | Go pull a cow's cunt over your head and get a bull to fuck some sense into you.
Wake up to yourself. |